I Can't Keep Doing This

In the past week, I've ended up signing close to 10 billion cards for people. For things like retirement, get-well-soon surgery, graduation, gaining superpowers from a radioactive-squirrel bite, etc.

I'm done. No more cards.

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  1. kate (183 comments) said,

    wait, i got one more card for your to sign! 😛

    yeah, i know what you mean…i run out of things to say after "good luck" "best wishes" and "happy retirement"…what else do you say after that? lol

    May 8, 2008 @ 2:02 pm

  2. sparx (882 comments) said,

    Right before posting this, I signed 5 cards "Good Luck".. I didn't even bother to look at who they were for… graduating students, that's all I know.

    May 8, 2008 @ 3:09 pm

  3. spudart (890 comments) said,

    Here's the secret for how to make signing cards into a fun activity. Stickers. Get yourself a sticker library. When you get a card to sign, it now becomes a fun game to see which stick you are going to put in the card. Then step it up a notch and draw a word bubble above the sticker and make it talk. OH YEAH. You'll never get the "sign-the-card blues" ever again.

    May 8, 2008 @ 11:11 pm

  4. unlikelymoose (375 comments) said,

    i gots an idea. Take a pair of scissors. cut a corner off the card. Then write, "i got hungry". Then sign your name. That could be your trademark. Very few cards circulate my office. 3 a year tops.

    May 9, 2008 @ 10:07 am

  5. unlikelymoose (375 comments) said,

    no, no. don't bother with the scissors. just rip a corner off. Or better yet, actually bit a corner off.

    May 9, 2008 @ 10:09 am

  6. spudart (890 comments) said,

    or you could put the card under some running water in the sink, and then write that you accidentally dropped it in the toilet. Then you could do that do every card, I bet people will stop passing cards to you to sign.

    May 9, 2008 @ 11:54 pm

  7. unlikelymoose (375 comments) said,

    oh my

    May 9, 2008 @ 11:55 pm

  8. spudart (890 comments) said,

    Although I really like my idea of saying you dropped it in the toilet, I have another idea that is actually serious. You could also draw a stick figure on the inside that sits on the printed message. That was my trademark. Then I started to draw him standing around on the bottom of the card. THEN, and GET THIS, I would start drawing the stick figure coming out the middle fold part of the card. OH I'M SUCH AN INNOVATIVE GENIUS.

    May 9, 2008 @ 11:59 pm

  9. unlikelymoose (375 comments) said,

    If i worked in the same office, I would make sure I got the card to sign after Matt and then draw a tiger eating his stick figure. No middle fold part could hide the stick figure from my tiger.

    May 10, 2008 @ 12:01 am

  10. spudart (890 comments) said,

    If i worked in the same office, I would make sure that Erik (oh wait, moose) would get the card before me. So that way his tiger could not eat my stick figure. And if he absolutely refused to sign the card before me. I wouls sign the card, but instead I would draw my figure with ink that fades after 12 hours. And then elsewhere on the card, I would draw the REAL stick figure in invisible ink that appears in 12 hours. Thus befuddling the plan of moose.

    May 10, 2008 @ 12:03 am

  11. spudart (890 comments) said,

    i win.

    May 10, 2008 @ 12:16 am

  12. unlikelymoose (375 comments) said,

    i'd just spray the card with ant-invisible ink spray. tiger eats stick figure.

    May 10, 2008 @ 12:27 am

  13. unlikelymoose (375 comments) said,

    anti-invisible spray. not ant-invisible spray. Who in the world would want to make ants invisible? I'd like to make them disappear, but making them invisible would solve nothing.

    May 10, 2008 @ 12:29 am

  14. spudart (890 comments) said,

    My invisible ants would attack you. I win.

    May 29, 2008 @ 3:48 pm

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